Jagged lines of cars at every gas station. Sitting in unending traffic jams, waiting for the car to run out of gas and the hurricane to slaughter you whilst you idled. Entire families peeing in the woods. Old women fighting old women for the last lonely Dasani bottle at the Krusty Mart. Oh the sweet memories of Houston Hurricanes...
Oddly, the last Houston hurricane debacle was one of the most traumatic experiences in recent memory. And for what? Nothing but a few overturned palm trees and a gentle sprinkle here or there. I've seen harder rains coming from the raised leg of a Chihuahua. In fact, I'm pretty sure it was one of the biggest Nature-fake-outs in the history of the United States.
Now that I've said all of this, I'm sure that this hurricane Ike will be doing much more damage to Houston, and I'm in no way saying that you should ignore that big glob of swirling clouds that has taken over all of your normal television programming, but I am saying... possibly consider staying at home instead of bolting for the nearest gas station. Or at least consider finding a nice comfy storm shelter... cause sitting in a traffic jam for 26 hours (no exaggeration) with a "deadly" hurricane approaching your stranded arse off the port bow... S.U.C.K.S.
I'm pretty sure that Houston has been hit by several hurricanes in its hot and humid history, and I'm pretty sure it survived. How could it not? The whole darn place is concrete.
If we were still there, instead of running for the hills, we'd pop some popcorn, kick back, get the candles ready, (in the safest place we could find- the Holtzman Fortress) and watch the show.
But hey, I'm the guy who used to get into a Ford Pinto with my buddy James and go Nader-chasing. Don't listen to me.