Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Bite the Dust

So, I was watching a bit of the Exorcist after I left a comment over at Brant's and... it got me thinking...

Sort of one of those, "ultimate fight" questions I guess.

So here goes:

If one of your relatives happen to become the unfortunate host of a ... demon.... who would you call?

1. Bob Larson 2. A Priest 3. Local Pastor 4. Benny Hinn 5. Carman


Who ya gonna call... (if you have someone else not mentioned on this list, then feel free.)



15 comments:

Lexie Ward said...

Benny Hinn or Jessie Duplantis.

euphrony said...

Carman would leave that demon crying for his mommy. But Benny Hinn has (or will soon have) his own private jet, so he could be there pronto.

Tough choice.

Seth Ward said...

Carman could sooooo kick the devil's butt.

All in all... I have to say I'd go with the local priest. That whole rite of exorcism sort of kicks prince-of-darkness butt.

Although I have heard the Benny's comb-over has some special zinger to it. Something about refracting light or something.

Susanne said...

I think I'd have Ashlee Simpson come over and sing to the demon...he'd be outta there in no time flat!

Susanne said...

Wait...what about Pat Robertson??! That guy can lift a car you know. Osteen? Nope...exorcism probably wouldn't fit into his life-is-always-good-if-you're-a-Christian image. Besides, I can't imagine him yelling at anyone. Seriously...I'd call up Beth Moore.

On a side note, I think the scariest part of the Bible is the part where the demon tells Jesus, "My name is Legion, for we are many." I get the creeps every time I read that.

Seth Ward said...

That is a scary part for sure.

So does anyone think that 'real' possesions take place today?

Lexie Ward said...

Yes, I certainly do.
I believe serial killers are possessed. And Hitler definitely had some devil mojo going on.

Rebecca said...

I once saw Benny HInn cast a "demon" out of someone at ORU. He didn't even touch the guy. He just looked at him and said "Come out." I am not kidding when I say the man looked like he was picked up and tossed backwards. Then Hinn said, "Saints, pray, the demon is out and is looking for a place to go." I was like, "Oh crap, please Jesus, don't let that demon come into me." I was scared. LOL.

Brody Harper said...

You left Stryper off the list, and everyone knows they like to Shout At The Devil.

Seth Ward said...

It is true. Styper does some good shouting, although Crue wrote that little masterpeice.

I think Stryper might just scare them off with their makeup, spandex and ... Well, go watch Spinal Tap.

Douglas said...

Why would the devil stop possessing people, just because they live 20 centuries after Christ walked around? I certainly believe that demonic possession is a possibility today. An older friend of mine has had some interesting experiences working long term with a man who was possessed.

Doug

Brody Harper said...

Seth.

You're right. I was thinking of "To Hell With The Devil" shame on me.

The Cachinnator said...

Ooooh, I'm all in with Brody. Stryper is who I'd call. All that friction from the spandex, the smoke from Oz Fox's guitar, the piercing screams of Michael Sweet's vocals, the androgynous confusion of Robert Sweet's appearance... that demon wouldn't have a chance!

And I'm with Doug on possession. He said it perfectly. And I'd probably call a priest as well - no one takes it as honestly or seriously as they do in most cases.

Douglas said...

Seth and Cach,

I'm humbled and impressed by the faith you two have placed in Catholic priests/the rite of excorcism. I've somewhat avoided answering the who would I go to question, because I'm not quite sure how to answer. By the grace of God, I haven't been faced with such a situation. I think this is one of those cases where God provides in the hour of need. I would probably go to the diocesan excorsist, but a local pentecostal preacher would be 2nd on my list and not too far down, either. He may be missing books out of his Bible and may not have the Eucharist or the sacramental priesthood, but he probably would have sincere faith.

Now I should probably add that I do believe that sacramentals like the oil of annointing (I forget the formal name) can be effective. Otherwise, why would the dead dude(s?) come back to life when his (their?) bodies touched Elijah's bones and why would people have been healed when they touched a hanky that the apostles had touched? At the same time, excorcism has always struck me as a tricky business highly dependent on the sanctity and discernment of the excorcist. Even the apostles had trouble and had to be taught by Jesus that "this kind only comes out by prayer and fasting" While I would have no answer for the person who said that that story was before the descent of the Holy Spirit at Pentecost, I guess I think there are situations where a Pentecostal preacher would be more effective than a Catholic priest excorcist.

Now I've mostly just talked off the top of my head without any personal experience in excorcism, I've completely left out the difference between say the eucharistic prayer and the rite of excorcism and I've quoted scripture completely from memory without looking things up, so there must be plenty of room to correct me in the above post and it wouldn't bother me if you did so, but that's what I'm thinking.

Doug

Van Ness said...

Oh, I'm so surprised, I'd go with Bob Larson, for sure. . . hands down! I've heard him on the radio dealing with the 'ugly' side of the Supernatural, and seen him on TV, he's got it down, it's almost like second nature to him now. . . it's kinda like his "niche" if you will.

Some preachers if you will are more 'exercised' for lack of better words at healing for example, and this guy is really in for a good 'go to the pit devil' all of the time.