Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Just Chillin and Watchin' the Wheel: Yes, we moved to NYC to be old.

It's a rainy evening here in the city. Amber cooked up a pot of instant organic butternut squash soup. It was nasty. We both agreed. Not her fault though. The Campbells box version is actually quite tasty. Something happened in the box-organic version. How the heck were we supposed to know that? Huh? Verdict: Campbells=tasty, organic version=gagalicious. (Sorry subscribers. I finally broke down and looked up the actual spelling of Campbells.)

We watched a bunch of American Idol contestants butcher some of my favorite Beatles songs last night. All I could say the whole time was, "thank you Micheal Jackson." If it wasn't for Peter-Pan-grilled-cheese-nose-captain-molesto Jackson, the Beatles library would still be preserved and the only version of Here Comes the Sun that anyone would know would be the one that George Harrison immortalized, not while a bunch of animated bees fly around or while several skinny people jump around or while Crystal Light is being poured, however artfully, on a Target commercial.

To me, hearing someone sing a Beatles cover poorly is akin to the poor soul who has to endure listening to their Dad's new blonde bimbo wife trying to talk motherly to them even though Dad's new bimbo wife is one year their junior.

It just gets under my skin like nobody's business. However I did hear a few of the young hopefuls do a good job on a Beatles cover. Well, actually it was a cover of a Whitesnake cover of a Beatles tune.


FancyPants said...

At least I didn't try to make Grilled Cheese with organic cheese and Ezekiel bread again.


What was I thinking?

My brother and his wife made real good ones. Why didn't it work for me?

What the... I'm stickin' to American and Mrs. Bairds.

majorsteve said...

Seth I have to admit to having watched AI for the past three years. I know I's the musical equivalent of eating Velveeta / Rotel cheese dip on cool ranch Doritos; everyone does it, but no one talks about it. The cool thing about the show is that it's really several shows in one; The first part of the season is the freak show, where we all ponder how someone could be sufficiently deluded to get up in front of MILLIONS of people and
"sing". My theory is that most of them are what we used to call "retarded", some people call them "slow" others say they are merely "tone deaf".

The second half of the show resembles a talent contest where somewhat talented young people get up and sing in front of millions of people without the hint of embarrassment.

A few of the most recent peeves on AI:

1) they've got the "mosh pit" down front, which is comprised of about thirty or so blond twenty something's and late teens. Their job is to wave their hands and yell and whistle and scream as if you were actually attending a real concert perfomance by someone of consequence. The "mosh pit" screams and clapps and whistles and waves their hands and claps along to whatever pathetic ribbon of rythim might present itself. I swear the AI most pit was carrying on as if John Lennon himself had appeared with Elvis singing backup. It was one of the lamest things I've ever seen. And then, the lame ass judges, the ultracool Randy Jackson (what up dog?), the never negative always tedious and halting and tentative and never ever want to hurt anybody's feelings Paula Abdul, and then there's the money shot, the inimitable Simon Scowl, the guy who could send Aretha Franklin crying to her dressing room, who could cause Barry White to have ED, who could choke up Janis Joplin and leave Bob Dylan speechless. Simon's motto: why just give constructive criticism when you can give constructive criticism, insult and humiliate an artist and earm a million dollars all at once.

I keep tuning in though...just hoping to see/hear that next great vocal.

This is dedicated to Melinda Doolittle. you rock!

Seth Ward said...

Fancy, nothing beats your lasagna. Plus, I think if you were a perfect cook, you would be just too perfect for me. I would have to shield myself from your power when entering the room.

Major, Don't get me wrong. I love AI. I really do. I'm not afraid to admit it either. We watch it religiously. In fact, I've liked it better the past few years. Even Simon has grown a bit of a heart. America loves him and he can't help but love us back.

However, I am a die-hard, forever and ever, fanatical Fab-four fan. I cannot abide anyone tromping around on their music. For some reason I would hear a high school Beatles review ANYDAY over the Idol carnage I heard the other night, and Simon agreed, as did the other two.

At least in high school they are being educated. Also, something about some of the attitudes of those who were picking their songs... really irked me. On the other hand, last weeks episode had some nice and thoughtful renditions. Regardless, the Beatles albums are holy and most of the time I only want to hear... maybe Elton or Allison Kraus sing a cover. OR someone who brings something TOTALLY original to the arrangement, like the Kings Singers did with Blackbird. For some reason that always seems to work with the spirit of their songs rather than a simple Karaoke reproduction.

nancy said...

My twelve year old son discovered the Beatles just before Christmas. Now, every time one of those commercials comes on he starts growling and griping about them ruining the song. This AI season has almost killed him.

Chaotic Hammer said...

Nanx and I have been watching Idol since the very beginning. For us, I'm not so sure that it's the show itself we like. It's the fact that it's something that anyone can do together. Everyone can have a strong opinion, and be a critic, and contribute to the conversation. It's good clean family fun. I hate to say it, but most of the other shows that either one of us watch, the other can barely even stand to be in the same room.

BONUS: Through the wonder of the DVR, the time to watch this show can be cut in half, and much useless jibber-jabber and shameless hocking of wares completely avoided.

Seth Ward said...


Sounds like your son just might be a genius...

Cham, yeah, we've missed a few seasons. But we've been enjoying the past two.