Saturday, November 17, 2007

Mom Can't Call Me Wisearse Anymore!

The wisdom teeth are OUT! The stuck a little I.V. in my arm and into la la land I went. O.U.T. Yup, just me and the purple elephant and cellophane flowers of yellow and green. I think I remember saying... "Well, there I go..." And then, darkness.

It's kinda creepy if you think about it. Just pretty much going into a coma of sorts. But I much prefer it to the grinding, sawing and slicing, IN MY TEETH, I would have endured opting to stay awake under "local anesthesia." Something I like to call, "dumb." I don't care if they call it laughing gas. The only people REALLY laughing are the dentists because you are saying such goofy things like. "Rara rirogaga garrarradarra," translated means, "that hurts like a banshee you filthy fatherless swine."

The whole operation went by pretty fast as wisdom teeth go. 30 minutes. Usually takes an hour and a half but I suppose mine were ready to be free. Or maybe I WILLED them to come lose in my sedated state. I have been polishing my force skills lately.

Now on to the subject of painkillers. I like them. A lot. Vicadin. Pretty swift little ditty they engineered there. Makes you feel...happy. All over. I bet if I plucked my eyebrows I wouldn't cry like the last time I tried it. Maybe I could even finish any set of dishes my mom decides to start washing in the liquid fire she runs into the sink, and then calls it "warm dish water." Who knows. Feeling too good to try.

So how do you all feel about pain killers? Know anything I should watch out for? I hear something called "Cannabis" is pretty effective for pain as well.

Let me take you back, cause I'm going too Strawberry fields, nothing is real... and nothing to get hung about... Vicadin fields forever.


Stephen said...

Seth, have you seen "Across the Universe" yet? The movie based on Beatles songs? I loved it, one of my favorite movies of the year, but I can only imagine how awesome it would be after taking a healthy dose of painkillers.

The Cachinnator said...

Sissy. I never take painkillers. And I never voluntarily let them put me under. I would've watched my own knee surgery if they could have gotten the epidural to work.

Chaotic Hammer said...


MamasBoy said...

"So how do you all feel about pain killers? Know anything I should watch out for?"

You had to ask...
Prescriptive drug addiction broke up a marriage and eventually killed a family friends' husband/dad, so I'm not a big fan. Now, as I hear the music his freaking genius daughter creates, I wonder what is going through her head and how she is coping and if she will ever reach her full musical potential. She seems to have lost her faith, and sometimes I wonder what else she's lost. I listen and I wonder, will she ever regain her hope? Will she ever regain her soul?


MamasBoy said...

anyway, I know you were joking. Its just a raw, emotional subject for me that I never have quite worked through. Sorry for doing some of that on your blog. Not the appropriate place, I know. Feel free to delete my comments.


kddub said...

Apparently after I got my wisdom teeth pulled, I was still pretty out of it, and walked out of the office saying, "that was fun!"

Seth Ward said...

NO no, Mamasboy. I take the subject of perscription drugs seriously as well. I had a good friend O.D. on them a few years back. (He survived) It is the biggest drug problem in America as the drugs are refined and less dangerous. It is almost like giving people Crack with directions on how and when to use it for the greatest effect.

I could name three people right now who are addicted to pain killers. It is certainly no laughing matter.

kdub, HA! I barely remember the wheelchair ride to the car. I can't believe I actually considered DRIVING myself.

C-ham, takes one to know one buddy.

Cach, I don't believe you.

MamasBoy said...


I didn't mean to imply that you don't take the subject seriously. You are just at a point where you can also joke about it. I'm not there yet, and that's my problem, not yours. I shouldn't have used your blog as a place to work through some of my own issues, and I'm sorry about that.