Wednesday, December 20, 2006

And So it Begins

The Christmas marathon has begun. We will be loading our SUV to the brim with clothes for an army, gifts for the chillins' and snacks that are healthy. I am particularly looking forward to loading this one bag of my wife's that is about as large as a small Volkswagen. I call it the back-crunchin’ #$%@#$!!!!!. I have thrown my back out hauling that (word that rhymes with sucker) in the truck at least twice.

So yonder it sits, in our bedroom green, huge and evil. Plotting its next move on my vertebrae.

I'm a comin' for you greeny. You and me Baby. I’ve been doing my yoga stretches and I've said my prayers. It's up to you to go easy or hard. You throw my back out this time around and I'm takin' some lighter fluid and a blowtorch to you. I'll dance around your burning polyester corpse like a wild Comanche.

Farwell Hot'n'muggy Houston. See you on the other side of the Wassail.

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